Ai, Cucarachas!

This just in, dear blog readers: in the years I've been a nurse, I've had to do a number of strange and wonderful things, but up until today, it has not included chasing a GIANT cockroach around the unit. (EWWWWWWW!) Toward the end of my shift this morning, a few of the nurses were wrapping up their final tallies and diaper changes when two nurses started squealing and hopping on the desk in the nurses' station. From across the room, I could see something scuttling across the floor. I kid you not, dear blog readers: it was the size of my entire thumb, including the joints down to the hand. Now, for some of you in certain parts of the world, these sorts of insects are a common every-day occurrence. For native Montanans like me, however, well...I've seen a few roaches here and there in some of the dumpy apartments in which I've resided, but I've never seen one in a nursing unit before, let alone a neonatal unit where funding is usually pretty good. And it was the biggest one I've ever seen.

I was a little creeped out by a) how fast they move and b) how it didn't die even after I stomped on it three times. (It was still scuttling around in circles, albeit mortally wounded.) We scooped it into a bag and labeled it for the cleaning guys, hoping that they might take note and somehow try to clean the place (i.e. sinks and drains, etc.). Easier said than done, but GROSS!!!

As a side note, one of the nurses said that we're not supposed to squash a cockroach, because a) they lay eggs and b) the "dead juice" attracts other roaches to the scene of familial demise. Does anyone know if this is true or not? I drove home with the paranoia that my shoes (if not wiped properly) might attract roaches into my home if they could sense that I had squashed Uncle Bug from Rady during the night.

To boot, not only was this on my mind, but I had strange and crazy dreams about roaches. I dreamed that one scuttled out in the grocery store and I had to step on it. I also dreamed that Tony Soprano was in the living room conniving to whack my sister, and I stepped on a roach to illustrate that I thought it was a lousy idea. (I can't say that most of my dreams make a lot of sense.)

To end the heeby-geebies, though, Mike was laying my fears to rest by telling me about the roaches he used to see in the dorm showers: how they crawled up through the drains and ran at his feet. His solution: run to wherever you have a lighter and some sort of aerosol can, and shoot an inferno at the little beast. His physical reenactment, friends, is what finally put my fears of roaches in my home to rest. For now. Until I see the next one and don't have any aerosol cans or lighters (candle lighters for me, since I'm not a smoker) to rest. :o)