Customer Service

Well, dear blog readers, I have to admit that I write this with a huge sense of irony, a tear on my face, and a piece of sugar-free chocolate in-hand along with a burning sensation in my chest. And no, it's not the holy spirit: it's just heart burn. Thank goodness for simethicon!

I'm also sitting on the living room floor of a nearly-empty apartment because the mover hasn't called to say when he'll deliver the furniture. Oh well.

So, the new job seems like it will be a good one. In orientation a couple of days ago, we had to sit through a "customer service" inservice/seminar on how to be nice to each other and to our patients and visitors. I thought this seemed a little redundant...Until I started feeling like the person in the case scenarios they ran through theoretically in class.

Back to the hospital in a minute. Mike and I went to the store Monday night to pick up a package of bottled water. Since it was our last night in a hotel, we decided it would be wise to get more drinking water. See, the hotel water had little bits of dirt and floaties (not to mention a bad taste), so we had been drinking bottled water all week.

For our basic cheap water choices, we ventured to Safeway. While I was paying for the water, the clerk rolled her eyes, huffed at me in disgust, picked the water up, and all but threw it into the cart. I looked at Mike; he looked at me in complete bewilderment. At first we thought perhaps we had done something to offend by not bagging our groceries. After checking with a few of the natives, however, we were informed that most grocery stores do indeed bag groceries for customers.

Well, we thought she was having a bad day. In the meantime, Mike went back to the same store. Same scenario; completely different clerk. Are people here THAT ecologically-minded? I'm sorry; I like being a good steward of the earth and all, but I like drinking healthy water just a tad more! You drink the stuff with the dirt in it and see how long you last, you clerks you! Oh well. Safeway will just lose another couple of customers.

Back to the hospital and customer service. So they showed this goofy video of a guy at a doctor's office and the horrible treatment he receives, while his dog goes to the vet and gets fabulous treatment. Right after this video, I raised my hand and asked where I needed to go the next morning for orientation. The HR lady raised her eyebrows and said, "Well, it's in your welcome letter" (from HR). I replied, "I never got one." She raised her eyebrows at me and said, "Well, ALL new hires get a welcome letter." I replied, "Well, mine must have gotten overlooked. I never received it." She was gracious enough to direct me to the human resources department after class. I went to get my badge and find out my orientation schedule. When I went to HR, they told me that in order to get my badge etc., I had to fill out all of my new hire paperwork. They also insisted that I should have done this prior to my first day of orientation. After all, "those instructions are in the welcome letter." (Sigh.) I smiled and politely sat down, filled out the 8 pages of new hire w2's, I9 forms, badge slips, etc. and managed to get my orientation schedule.

Yesterday, we had the benefits rep from HR talk to us about our hospital benefits enrollment. In passing, he mentioned that FMLA kicks in after a year. "Uh oh" crossed my mind, so I went to HR after orientation to get the scoop. The benefits rep was gone for the day.

So back again this morning to HR. The FMLA/leave of absence rep was there this morning, and sure enough: unless I have worked 180 days, I do not qualify for maternity leave. She said this with a smile on her face, followed by "Aren't babies such a blessing? They always cost you way more than you think they will." (Not the time to joke to a pregnant woman, friend.) And then she tells me that my job would not be guaranteed if I need a personal leave of absence for maternity leave, and that it was up to the department manager to decide whether or not my position would be terminated. (Fortunately my managers told me this afternoon that they wouldn't sink that kind of money into my orientation only to fire me for having a baby.) In the meantime, even if my personal leave is granted by HR, my benefits have to be paid out-of-pocket (i.e. Cobra) and that I probably won't qualify for disability, since I'm not covered under FMLA. So basically, maternity leave=leave without pay OR benefits.

What's really frustrating is that before we moved, I called HR and asked them about maternity leave and benefits, and I was assured that all of my benefits would become effective Aug. 1st. So much for customer service. Good thing for us that God doesn't operate on a human level of customer service. It'll be really interesting to watch how he looks out for us on this front, because right now, there's not much I can do about it other than pinch pennies and hope we have enough in savings for 30 days of maternity/personal leave of absence.